In Japan, saying goodbye to someone who has passed away often begins the night before the funeral.

Family members gather.

Incense burns quietly.

A Buddhist priest chants prayers.

And friends, neighbours, and colleagues arrive to pay their respects.

This gathering is called Otsuya (お通夜).

But here's something interesting.

The word Otsuya originally refers to staying awake through the night.

And traditionally, that's exactly what families did.

They stayed beside their loved one until morning.

Today, Japanese funeral wakes have changed, but many of their customs remain.

Why do Japanese families hold a wake before the funeral?

Why do guests bring money?

And why might everyone share a meal afterward?

Let's discover the meaning behind Otsuya and the traditions that make it an important part of Japanese funeral culture.

What Is Otsuya (お通夜)?

お通夜 (Otsuya) is a Japanese funeral wake, usually held before the main funeral ceremony.

Let's break down the Japanese.

お (O) — A polite prefix

通夜 (Tsuya) — Staying awake through the night

The word reflects the traditional practice of remaining with the deceased overnight.

In many Japanese Buddhist funeral traditions, Otsuya takes place on the evening before the funeral.

Family members, relatives, friends, colleagues, and neighbours may attend.

During the wake, guests express condolences, offer incense, and pay their respects.

Although the ceremony is solemn, Otsuya also provides an opportunity for people to gather and support the bereaved family.

It's both a farewell and an expression of community.

Why Did Japanese Families Stay Awake All Night?

Historically, Japanese funeral wakes involved family members remaining beside the deceased through the night.

This tradition is associated with keeping vigil, offering prayers, and accompanying the deceased before the funeral.

In earlier times, relatives might gather around the body, burn incense, and spend the night remembering their loved one.

The practice was also connected with traditional beliefs and customs surrounding death.

Staying awake represented care, respect, and the unwillingness to leave the deceased alone.

But today, most Otsuya ceremonies don't require guests to remain awake all night.

The tradition has evolved.

How Has Otsuya Changed in Modern Japan?

Modern Japanese funeral wakes are often shorter than their traditional counterparts.

A typical Otsuya ceremony may last approximately one to two hours, although arrangements vary.

Guests commonly arrive in the early evening.

A Buddhist priest may chant sutras.

Mourners offer incense.

And afterward, some guests share a meal.

There are two terms worth knowing.

Hontsuya (本通夜) — The Formal Wake

本通夜 (Hontsuya) refers to the formal wake, commonly held the evening before the funeral.

This is the ceremony that friends, colleagues, and other mourners may attend.

Karitsuya (仮通夜) — The Preliminary Wake

仮通夜 (Karitsuya) refers to a preliminary wake.

It may take place before the formal Otsuya, often with close family members and relatives.

Not every family holds both.

Modern funeral arrangements vary according to religion, region, and family preferences.

What Happens During a Japanese Funeral Wake?

If you've never attended Otsuya, you might wonder what actually happens.

Although the details vary, a traditional Buddhist wake often follows a recognizable sequence.

1. Guests Arrive and Register

When guests arrive, they may first visit a reception desk called:

受付 (Uketsuke)

Here, mourners may write their names and addresses in a guestbook.

They also commonly present condolence money, known as Kōden.

The reception staff then direct guests to the ceremony area.

2. The Buddhist Priest Begins Chanting

During a Buddhist wake, a priest may chant sutras.

This is called:

読経 (Dokyō)

Buddhist sutra chanting.

The chanting is part of the religious ceremony and may express prayers, teachings, and remembrance according to the Buddhist school.

Guests generally sit quietly during this part of the service.

3. Guests Offer Incense

One of the most recognizable Japanese funeral customs is:

焼香 (Shōkō)

The offering of incense.

Guests approach an incense burner and offer a small amount of powdered incense.

The procedure varies by Buddhist tradition.

Some mourners raise the incense toward their forehead before placing it onto burning charcoal.

Others place it directly into the burner.

The gesture expresses reverence and remembrance.

4. Mourners Pay Their Respects

Guests may bow toward the altar, the deceased, or the bereaved family.

Some quietly join their hands in prayer.

The exact etiquette depends on the family's religious tradition.

5. The Ceremony Concludes

After the chanting and incense offerings, the formal ceremony comes to an end.

Some guests leave shortly afterward.

Others may be invited to share a meal with the family.

And this leads to another interesting Japanese funeral tradition.

What Is Tsuyaburumai (通夜振る舞い)?

Here's something that might surprise foreigners.

After a Japanese funeral wake, guests may be offered food and drinks.

This custom is called:

通夜振る舞い (Tsuyaburumai)

A meal or refreshments provided following the wake.

The gathering gives mourners an opportunity to spend time together and remember the deceased.

Traditionally, families and guests might share food while talking about memories of their loved one.

The atmosphere remains respectful, but it may be less formal than the religious ceremony itself.

What Food Is Served at Otsuya?

Common examples include:

• Sushi
• Onigiri
• Sandwiches
• Simmered dishes
• Tea and other beverages
• Sake or beer in some settings

The menu varies by family, region, and funeral arrangements.

Food may be provided by a funeral hall or catering service.

In some traditions, accepting at least a small amount of food is considered a way of acknowledging the family's hospitality.

However, guests aren't universally required to stay or eat.

Modern families may choose not to hold Tsuyaburumai at all.

Why Do People Bring Money to Otsuya?

At many Japanese funeral wakes, guests bring condolence money.

It's called:

香典 (Kōden)

Kōden is money offered to the bereaved family as an expression of sympathy and practical support.

The tradition has historical connections to offerings of incense and other goods.

Today, money is commonly placed inside a special condolence envelope.

What Is a Kōdenbukuro (香典袋)?

A 香典袋 (Kōdenbukuro) is a ceremonial envelope used for condolence money.

It often features subdued colours and decorative cords called Mizuhiki.

The guest's name is usually written on the front.

The wording on the envelope depends on the family's religious tradition.

How Much Kōden Should You Give?

The amount depends on your relationship with the deceased, your age, local customs, and other circumstances.

For colleagues or acquaintances, approximately ¥3,000–¥10,000 is a common general range.

Close relatives may give more.

Some families decline condolence money entirely.

This is called:

香典辞退 (Kōden Jitai)

If the family has requested no Kōden, respect their wishes.

Should You Give Kōden at Both Otsuya and the Funeral?

Generally, no.

If you're attending both the wake and funeral, condolence money is usually presented only once.

Giving it twice is not customary.

What Should You Wear to Otsuya?

Japanese funeral clothing is traditionally conservative.

Formal mourning attire is called:

喪服 (Mofuku)

Black is the standard colour for formal mourning clothes.

For Men

A typical outfit includes:

• Black suit
• White shirt
• Black tie
• Black shoes
• Dark socks

For Women

Common choices include:

• Simple black dress or suit
• Black shoes
• Understated accessories
• Conservative hairstyle

Pearls may be appropriate, but jewellery isn't necessary.

Can You Wear Something Other Than Black?

Traditionally, a wake held soon after an unexpected death could be attended in subdued everyday clothing, reflecting that guests had little time to prepare.

However, modern Otsuya ceremonies commonly follow formal black mourning attire.

If you're unsure, a simple, conservative dark outfit is generally the safest option.

Avoid bright colours, flashy accessories, and casual clothing.

What Should You Say at Otsuya?

Japanese funeral etiquette tends to favour short, respectful expressions.

You don't need to make a long speech.

A common expression is:

このたびはご愁傷様です。

Kono tabi wa goshūshō-sama desu.

"My deepest condolences."

Another formal expression is:

お悔やみ申し上げます。

Okuyami mōshiagemasu.

"I offer my condolences."

You may also hear:

心よりお悔やみ申し上げます。

Kokoro yori okuyami mōshiagemasu.

"I offer my heartfelt condolences."

A quiet bow is appropriate.

It's generally best to avoid overly cheerful language or lengthy conversations unless the family initiates them.

What Is the Difference Between Otsuya and Osōshiki?

Otsuya and Osōshiki are closely connected, but they aren't exactly the same.

お通夜 (Otsuya) — The funeral wake.

お葬式 (Osōshiki) — The funeral.

In many Japanese Buddhist funeral arrangements, the wake takes place in the evening and the funeral follows the next day.

Otsuya (Wake)	Osōshiki (Funeral)
Usually held in the evening	Often held during the daytime
Traditionally associated with an overnight vigil	Includes formal funeral rites
Friends, colleagues, and relatives may attend	Family, relatives, and other mourners may attend
Incense offerings are common	Incense offerings are also common
May include Tsuyaburumai	May be followed by other farewell and cremation rituals

Both provide opportunities to honour the deceased.

But Otsuya is traditionally associated with gathering before the final funeral ceremony.

Do Japanese People Attend Both Otsuya and the Funeral?

Not necessarily.

In many cases, people attend whichever ceremony is more practical or appropriate.

Otsuya is commonly held in the evening, making it easier for colleagues, friends, and acquaintances to attend after work.

The funeral itself may take place during working hours.

Close relatives often attend both ceremonies.

However, attendance depends on the family's wishes and the type of funeral.

Some families now choose small private ceremonies called:

家族葬 (Kazokusō)

Family funerals.

In these cases, attendance may be limited to relatives and close friends.

Always respect the family's invitation and instructions.

Do All Japanese Funerals Have Otsuya?

No.

Although Otsuya is a familiar part of Japanese funeral culture, not every funeral includes a wake.

Some families choose a simpler funeral format.

One example is:

一日葬 (Ichinichisō)

A one-day funeral.

This arrangement generally omits the wake and holds the funeral ceremony on a single day.

Another option is:

直葬 (Chokusō)

A direct cremation arrangement without a conventional funeral ceremony.

The exact services and rituals vary.

Families may choose these arrangements for personal, financial, religious, or practical reasons.

Modern Japanese funeral practices are increasingly diverse.

Is Otsuya a Buddhist Tradition?

Otsuya is strongly associated with Japanese Buddhist funeral practices.

However, wakes and evening gatherings are not exclusive to Buddhism.

Japan has a long history of overlapping religious and local customs.

Buddhist funerals commonly involve sutra chanting and incense offerings.

Shinto funeral ceremonies follow different religious practices.

Christian funerals may include prayers, hymns, and other forms of remembrance.

Secular funerals may be organized around the deceased's life and personal wishes.

Therefore, the word Otsuya can refer to a familiar type of funeral gathering, but the ceremony itself may differ depending on the family's beliefs.

What Is Juzu (数珠), and Do You Need It at Otsuya?

At a Buddhist wake, you may notice guests holding small prayer beads.

These are called:

数珠 (Juzu)

Buddhist prayer beads.

They are used in Buddhist religious practices and may be held while joining the hands in prayer.

Some people carry their own Juzu to funerals and memorial services.

But what if you're a foreign visitor and don't have any?

That's generally fine.

You don't need to purchase prayer beads just to attend a funeral.

You can simply bow and follow the ceremony respectfully.

The most important thing is to avoid treating religious objects as casual accessories.

What Is the Meaning Behind Otsuya?

At first glance, Otsuya might seem like a collection of formal rituals.

Black clothing.

Incense.

Buddhist chanting.

Condolence money.

A quiet meal afterward.

But behind these customs is a deeply human purpose.

Giving people time to say goodbye.

Traditionally, staying beside the deceased through the night represented care and companionship.

Today, the ceremony also gives friends and relatives an opportunity to support the grieving family.

A colleague may attend after work.

An old friend may travel to pay their respects.

Relatives may gather and share memories.

And sometimes, the simple act of being present means more than words.

Otsuya reminds us that mourning isn't only a private experience.

It can also be a moment when a community comes together.

Frequently Asked Questions

What does Otsuya mean in Japanese?

Otsuya (お通夜) refers to a Japanese funeral wake, traditionally associated with staying awake beside the deceased through the night.

When is Otsuya held?

It is commonly held on the evening before the funeral, although arrangements vary.

How long does Otsuya last?

Modern formal wake ceremonies often last approximately one to two hours. Additional gatherings may continue afterward.

Do you have to stay overnight at Otsuya?

No. Most guests attend the formal evening ceremony and leave afterward. Close family members may remain longer.

What should you wear to Otsuya?

Black formal mourning clothes are customary at many modern Japanese wakes. Conservative dark clothing may be acceptable in some circumstances.

Do you bring money to Otsuya?

Yes, condolence money called Kōden is commonly brought unless the family has declined it.

Can foreigners attend Otsuya?

Yes, when attendance is appropriate and welcomed by the family. Visitors should follow the family's instructions and respect the ceremony.

What is Tsuyaburumai?

Tsuyaburumai (通夜振る舞い) refers to food and refreshments offered to mourners after the wake.

What is the difference between Otsuya and a funeral?

Otsuya is the wake held before the funeral. The funeral generally includes the main religious and farewell ceremonies.

Do you need Buddhist prayer beads at Otsuya?

No. Juzu are commonly used by Buddhist mourners, but visitors generally don't need to bring them.

Can you attend Otsuya instead of the funeral?

Yes. Many people attend the wake rather than the daytime funeral, depending on their relationship with the deceased and the family's wishes.

Do all Japanese families hold Otsuya?

No. Some families choose one-day funerals, direct cremation, or other arrangements that omit the wake.

🇯🇵 Keep Discovering Japan

Curious about another Japanese funeral custom? Explore What Is Kōden (香典)? Why Japanese People Give Money at Funerals to discover the meaning behind Japan's condolence money tradition.

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At JapPop, we celebrate Japanese culture through playful illustrations, original characters, and stories inspired by everyday life in Japan.

From traditional customs and curious language quirks to folklore, food, anime, and modern pop culture, we explore the little details that make Japan so fascinating.

Otsuya is a reminder that traditions aren't always about grand ceremonies.

Sometimes, they're about the simplest human gestures.

Showing up.

Sitting quietly.

Remembering someone.

And being there for a family during a difficult time.

The rituals may look different from those in other countries.

But the emotions behind them are universal.

Love.

Grief.

Gratitude.

And the wish to say one last goodbye.

Discover Japan, one story at a time. 🇯🇵